About Simona Rich

My childhood

My name is Simona Rich and I was born in Vilnius, the capital of Lithuania.

I grew up with my mother and brother. My father was mainly absent from my life from the age of sixteen, and that was a good thing.

He was an alcoholic, so because of his emotional terrorism the entire family greatly suffered. It sometimes truly felt like living in hell.

My childhood photo

My childhood photo

It was my mother who paid the bills and raised us.

Because of the emotional terrorism of my father, I as a child suffered the most because I was the most sensitive.

I suffered from extreme emotional ups and downs, and when in my teenage years (when I was sixteen), due to more self-awareness and intelligence, I started realizing what such emotional rides do to my body and mind, I started seeking a way out of this unhappy situation.

That’s how I found meditation. The first book that I read on this subject was Deep Meditation by Yogani and it was the only meditation book that I read for many years. It totally transformed my emotional state, and from a girl who was totally controlled by emotions I became calm and strong.

What’s more, yogic powers started developing in me, such as internal heat, which confirmed to me that yoga had some substance to it; though at that time I knew very little of this form of spirituality, and I had no idea that later in life it would become such a big part of my life.

At school, I was very average. But at the age of sixteen I got my first job – at the department store where my mother was a director. That job was very difficult and it made me realize that if I stayed average at school, I would have to stay stuck in a job as such for the rest of my life.

This was an excellent motivation to start taking my studies seriously, and to have best chances of success, I focused only on one subject to master it as best as I could – the English language.

I fell in love with the English language the first time I started studying it, and I also wanted to leave my country and study abroad, as I didn’t see many ways to succeed in my country due to its economic situation. Plus, most people were very negative in my home country. So learning English to the best of my ability was a logical choice.

My daily intense studies brought forth excellent fruit, as I scored 100% in the English state exam – the only one in the capital (and maybe in the whole country) to do it.

Life in the UK

I got a scholarship to study tourism in the UK. There I started a very ‘normal’ life. I was in a relationship, living with my partner in his apartment, watching TV and having an okay-paying job.

But although I was living the life that’s supposed to be normal by today’s standards, I always felt that there’s something wrong with this kind of lifestyle.

I knew it always, that feeling was always in the background whether I was watching TV, enjoying my favorite M&M’s, taking a stroll down the city streets, or spending time with my boyfriend. I couldn’t really define that feeling, though. I just knew that I was searching for something, and I thought that I would never find it – I assumed that there’s no answer to that unspoken question.

So I continued my average existence, though always aware of the fact that something was wrong with that kind of living; that some major part of my life was missing, or that something was hidden from me. Therefore, I’d been a truth seeker since the very beginning, but it took me some time to understand that it’s the truth that I was searching for.

A turn for the better

What really triggered me to rethink my life were two things. The death of an employee at the time of me working in a business call center; as well as the question that reached me out of nowhere, when, one afternoon, I was walking to the bookshop after finishing my call-center shift.

The question that I heard in my head was this:

Is this all life can offer me?

I never thought about such things before, so it felt like the question didn’t come from me but from outside (which probably is true). It took me out of balance, and although I was pondering on it, I couldn’t really answer it.

I entered the bookshop and started browsing; I would go to that bookshop often those days, but I would never buy anything – I just loved browsing through all sorts of books. But that time a particular book caught my attention, and I knew that I had to get it.

It was Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki, and it was the book that totally changed my understanding of how to handle finances, and it was the book that started my journey towards financial independence.

This book led me to many other wealth books, such as Think and Grow Rich and The 4-Hour Workweek and the more of them I read and applied in my life, the more in control of my finances I got.

Reading such books eventually led me to a similar category of self-help books to do with personal development. That was the new-age type of books, which are good for those who know nothing about how the reality works, but later you realize that they present incomplete information. But about that later.

I ended up reading hundreds of new-age and wealth books, and due to this I totally changed my life, became emotionally and financially independent, started my own blog, and, when the blog generated enough income, I finally was able to decide where I really wanted to live.

Life in India, love and spirituality

In Kerala, India

In Kerala, India

To decide where to live, I asked the Universe for the best suggestion.

All sorts of messages started reaching me about India.

So I took it as a sign that it was the place where I should go. And the day I landed there, that place felt like home.

It was in India that I started to seriously practice meditation. There I also discovered yoga, and all sorts of other eastern traditions got my attention such as palmistry and astrology.

Yoga and meditation, however, remained my major pursuits throughout my years there.

With friends in a cafe in South India

With good friends in a cafe in South India

It was in India that I met my first (and probably last human) love. He was a karate master, and we were as different as water and fire. Yet I will never forget those days filled with exciting bike trips (he was an excellent motorcycle rider), passionate arguments and sweet reconciliations. He used to say about our relationship that it’s like the relationship between India and Pakistan:)

Thus, I was in a relationship with the person that I truly loved, living in the country which was my spiritual home and had a successful business.

I had achieved all that I wanted in my life, and those days were indeed like heaven.

I will be forever grateful for the Universe to have allowed me to live my life to the full. All my worldly dreams by that time had been achieved.

I didn’t know it at the time that my boyfriend was a psychopath, and we separated eventually not because of his condition (as at that time I didn’t know anything about psychopathy) but because, due to my deep study of yoga, I decided to become celibate.

He was never able to impact me to any great degree, because my priority was always business and meditation, and after that came him. I believe that psychopaths can only destroy those people who make them their priority.

For me, spirituality was more important in my life than him, and separation from the person that I loved was a small price to pay for illumination.

And when I understood his condition, I have learnt one of the most important lessons of my life. I will be forever grateful that my eyes were opened to the existence of such type of beings, and spending time with him in general has taught me so much.

We can learn not only from those that are good, but all life can teach us, every minute of it – if we are attentive. And I cannot even say that I only learnt from him what no to do. He taught me how to get along with all kinds of people; he made me understand how to become a likable personality. But he also made me understand that some very intelligent people use that intelligence only for evil.

Life as a celibate; Indian arts and spirituality

Following my decision to become celibate, I have separated myself from the society more and more. Eventually, I decided to rent a house in a semi-jungle place in South India, without almost any furniture.

I slept on the ground, and my days were filled with yoga, meditation and contemplation. I would sometimes share with my readers what I learnt as well as my spiritual experiences, but I would post only once or twice in a fortnight at that stage.

Dancing with children! (Bharatanatyam)

Dancing with children! (Bharatanatyam)

But my life was not all about solitude. Just before renting the new place, I lived in another location in South India, in a modest hut with a Bharatanatyam dance teacher and her little child.

It was a traditional arrangement – a student living with a teacher. That woman had taught me so much, and I still keep in touch with that special soul.

When I moved to the new place, the only social thing that I did was to attend Carnatic music classes in a traditional school in the city of Trivandrum.

Indian arts were always fascinating to me, and my strong pull towards appreciating and studying them, together with the pull towards yoga and meditation show to me that it’s very likely that if I ever lived as a human before, I had definitely been Indian.

Needless to say, I was the only foreigner in that school, and in general I was the only foreigner in many places and pursuits whilst in India. Whenever you have a concentration of foreigners in India, the arts or spirituality will be watered down – this is the truth. If you want to experience real India, stay away from tourist spots.

In a sari near my Bharatanatyam teacher's relative's home

In a sari near my Bharatanatyam teacher’s relatives’ home

In that Carnatic school I met a special girl and we became good friends.

Coffee day cafe

Coffee day cafe

We would go to the Coffee Day coffee shop after school, order latte, enjoy looking at huge Banyan trees growing nearby, and praise our music teacher for his excellent personality and a beautiful voice.

We were both looking up to him, and he was the person that I almost broke my celibacy with, which was initiated more from his side (Though it didn’t help that I would stare at him a lot because of his exceptional personality and charisma!).

This also ruined my friendship with that special lady who also liked him I suppose; and it was my past readers who are familiar with that story which I prefer not to tell here as it’s long!

Since I fully followed the doctrines of yoga and meditation, together with strict celibacy, almost no engagement with the outside world and regular reading of Indian spiritual texts, my progress was fast.

Soon I could get into very deep meditative states, my third eye chakra got activated enabling me to see visions and colors.

Pooja next to my house gates in South India

Pooja next to my house gates in South India during a holy festival.

I quite mastered yoga and I was encouraged by some of my readers and those who knew me personally to become a yoga teacher. That, however, never felt right for me.

Despite of my refusal to become a yoga teacher, I would personally spend sometimes several hours a day practicing yoga.

In my rented house in South India in semi-jungle

In my rented house in South India in semi-jungle

Due to my studies of Indian spiritual books, meditation and the yogic practice, I was becoming increasingly detached.

Though I was never a person that could be called “attached”, the detachment was definitely increasing.

I could stay alone, without speaking, for days, and there was never any desire to break such silence.

Meeting Indian gurus further convinced me that my spiritual progress was fast.

At the very last stages of awakening I would get people approaching me to acknowledge my spiritual presence.

It happened so often that I could not dismiss it as a mere coincidence.

On my 29th birthday, If I'm not mistaken.

On my 29th birthday

Some people would hold hands in a “namaste” position without even knowing me; some would approach me to express their amazement at the kind of aura/energy that I had.

By this time I had a thriving self-improvement and spirituality blog.

I was getting around six thousand daily readers, and I had around 45,000 social network followers and newsletter subscribers.

I thought that my new-age articles greatly helped people to find God, and the feedback that I got from my readers further convinced me of this.

An unexpected turn

Just before my thirtieth birthday, I left India, as I was getting too attached to my beloved country. After all, I had been living there for years, and I started feeling that the country itself became like a spiritual crutch for me.

In order to test my independence from India, I decided to leave. I booked a flight ticket to Philippines.

A picture taken right before the second (spiritual) birth. The old self is dead, it’s possible to see that in the eyes.

Upon staying in the new country for around two months, I continued experiencing all kinds of spiritual phenomena as a result of my yoga and meditation practices.

Finally, one day, whilst I was having tea in a restaurant in Boracay (it’s an island in Philippines), I experienced the most extraordinary thing.

The place of the scull called “anterior fontanelle” got saturated with something that felt like a cool liquid or energy, and that energy then travelled through the brain pathways to embrace the whole brain and the spinal cord.

Although at that time I didn’t know what had happened, soon I realized that this was the opening of my crown chakra, the kundalini being freed to merge with the Infinite, and the soma nectar renewing my whole nervous system. 

After this event I no longer felt the same way; I felt that a channel of some sort opened in my head. I felt that there’s a definite energy pathway that got opened. Since I was very familiar with Indian spiritual texts, I knew that this opening was supposed to connect me with God – that the Shakti in me was supposed to travel to her Shiva.

After two months of this opening, I started worrying, because I noticed that this opening didn’t empower me in any way, but actually made me much more vulnerable. Before the opening I was fine with feeling energies or getting visions. But now those energies and visions started frightening me, because I understood that the spiritual realm was very, very real, and that it’s not what people think it to be.

The event that really convinced me that I was messing with the energies whose nature I wasn’t told about by the Indian spiritual texts was when I was in Malaysia, sitting in a Buddhist temple – around two months after the crown-chakra opening.

I bent down to search for something in my bag, and a monk passed by very close to my crown chakra. As soon as he passed by, I felt a sudden forceful invasion of a really low-vibration energy into my body through the crown chakra. Not that I’m against Buddhist monks, but people could be either good or evil no matter to what religion they belong.

It was so unexpected and the energy was so strong, that it totally took me out of balance, and I needed to really hold myself and breathe slowly to recover. That was the first time I felt spiritually violated, though I felt this way several times before, though in a much milder degree, after the opening of the crown chakra.

So when I was thinking about my state, I became increasingly more worried. I felt not myself anymore. I felt like I lost a personal component of my life, which, as I was taught by the Hindu spiritual doctrine, was a very good thing. But in Hinduism there’s a promise that when this happens, you get a divine life in return. This didn’t happen. [Update: it did happen later, please read till the end.]

The crown-chakra opening made me open to the almost tangible reality of the spiritual world, and it was so overwhelming and confusing, that one day I almost broke down. I fell on my knees and started praying for God to show me the truth, no matter what the cost, because I didn’t want to live in such a state of not knowing what’s happening to me.

And God heard my genuine prayers, and He showed me the truth. What it became clear to me through this revelation is that I broke many of God’s laws, and that they are the universal laws that are found in Christian commandments as well as in other spiritual teachings.

At that moment I still thought God to be external, but as my spiritual birth developed, I realized that what happened was the connection with the Higher brain/Higher Self, so well shown in this famous painting:

The creation of Adam

Here we see that Adam is reaching out to the “Father in Heaven”, when that Father is nothing more than his Higher Self/Higher brain, shown in a cloud-outline which is actually the brain of Adam and not an external cloud in the sky.

I was so frightened by this experience that I thought that I was fooled by the yogic spiritual teachings. It took me a year to really understand what had happened by thinking about this experience almost every day. What I realized was that I got exactly what I was searching for all my life – the truth; but it wasn’t what I expected it to be!

Even after researching kundalini awakening accounts, I came to the conclusion that coming in touch with/being assaulted by demonic entities is natural when you’re waking up. That’s because you’re becoming a bright being, and those dark entities are surprised by seeing such a thing in this dark world, and they feel threatened by such a light. Thus, they come to destroy and attack, in order to extinguish the light that’s getting brighter. That explains the miserable look that I got from that Buddhist monk I told you about.

I talk about my realizations in this video:

My Sun Behind the Sun book deals with my new realizations as well.

For more than a year I intensely studied the Bible and extra-biblical material. I had spiritual experiences and even saw the trinity in a dream. However, after this intense study I came to the conclusion that the prayers of Christians are actually channeled to the Egyptian trinity due to the way that the Catholic Church has altered the original faith.

Yes, the commandments are true; but they are not Christian – they are universal; you find them in much older texts than the Bible.

I’ve realized that the Bible has many masonic symbols, coded messages and stories taken from ancient pagan faiths. I still believe that Yeshua’s teachings were right and should be followed by the humanity, but now I also know almost beyond doubt that he was one of the initiates, or – magicians.

I ran to Jesus as a result of the scary awakening as I was taken out of balance; but the realization that the “Father in Heaven” was nothing more than the Higher Self who is the original law giver, and Jesus – the Christ which is love/enlightenment, I could not help but distance myself from the orthodox Christianity that takes everything literally and anthropomorphizes the forces of nature.

These discoveries empowered and freed me, but at the same time many of my readers were disappointed by me distancing myself from Christianity.

By that time I have gathered a strong Christian community around me. This phase of my life lasted for a year. So when I deconverted, some even accused me of being a false teacher, and some attacked me with hurtful accusations.

After more than a year of the third-eye chakra opening I began really understanding what took place that day.

I got anointed with the soma liquid. The meaning of the word “Christ” is the “anointed one”. “Messiah” means the same thing. Everyone of us should experience that anointing because that’s a true born-again experience – internal salvation.

This teaching of how to be born-again is found in the esoteric teachings of different religions, but it’s suppressed and therefore people need to go beyond the surface of mainstream religions to find it. This is the most important thing that could happen in a human life because it’s the true mental, spiritual and physical transformation.

Because these inner teachings are only partially available (forces of darkness always attempted to destroy them), we don’t have the full information of how to go through this process safely, so things go wrong. If you don’t purify and prepare yourself, things can go really bad as I mention in many of my posts on kundalini. Through the grace of God I was able to go through it, but the experience was frightening.

During that experience you suddenly find the veil of Maya being torn and you see the spirit realm. For those who never experienced it, or experienced it only a little, this can be traumatic. And if you don’t understand the process, it can completely frighten you.

This spiritual experience is known in many cultures, both Western and Eastern. They are just described from different perspectives. Thus, for example, you find it described under the “shifting of assemblage point” label in Carlos Castaneda’s books, who describes this lifting of the veil perfectly.

You will experience intense purification when you go through a true awakening, and it might seem that all your energy is being removed through the crown chakra. Demons will attack you as now you are a bright being, and sometimes they may even try to possess you so that they frighten you and you stop the awakening.

Your old personality dies and it will feel like you are extinguishing your very self. You are truly dying in one sense – the old you, the ego, everything that was selfish and worldly, definitely dies. These experiences might be truly disturbing, and that’s what New Age fails to address, painting everything in bright colors.

I did more reading about these experiences, and I realize now that all the stages that happened to me are listed in the spiritual books in esoteric Hinduism. At first it’s frightening, especially if one is not ready. But later the experience normalizes and then the benefits are felt.

I’m at the stage where I feel the benefits of awakening. My mood is uplifted almost always, I am not shaken by things that most people are shaken by. Since the personal energy after the transformation vibrates at a much higher level, I tend to stay alone as there’s really nothing in common between me and most people. In Buddhism this stage is called “a change in lineage”, because after your second birth (not a Christian term, by the way) you really become more than human.

I’m not telling this arrogantly, I’m just explaining what to expect as this will happen to all who go through this experience. There is definitely the connection with the Divine. I can learn new things very quickly and there’s plenty of energy.

What I experienced is called “enlightenment” in Hinduism. But New-Age got it all wrong. It’s not that you become God and know everything when this happens to you. But it’s the process when you are born of spirit, and a great transformation follows this experience.

I’m still in the process of learning about this experience and feeling its benefits. After it there’s a lot of work to do; one needs to totally unify oneself – merge the conscious with the subconscious mind, to become a whole human being. This is just one of the many things to do.

Life in Lithuania

A picture from my garden in Lithuania

A picture from my garden in Lithuania

After living many years in India, I finally felt the urge to return to my home country.

I returned here recently (in June of 2018) and purchased a plot of land in a village, with a wooden hut.

I hope to make this place a perfect meditation spot and live a natural, self-sustaining life.

In the future, if everything goes well, I hope to invite my readers to meditate here with me.

But first, some more spiritual heights must be achieved, so that I establish myself and mature in those states. I know that I will feel when it’s the right time to gather a community of meditators around me, and I hope to achieve it in this lifetime.

My story doesn’t end here. It’s an ever-going process. Every day I’m learning something new and my understanding of this reality is expanding, whilst old beliefs are breaking down. This is again one of the things that happens after the awakening – the destruction of all false concepts and beliefs.

I hope that you will learn from my journey and benefit from my attained knowledge; I hope that the information on this blog will help you to avoid the mistakes that I made in my spiritual path, so that your progress is faster and smoother.

Thank you for reading this far; if you wish to keep in touch with me, you may choose to subscribe to my newsletter found close to the top of the right sidebar, so that you are updated when I post a new article. You may also choose to donate or support me on Patreon, for which I would be very grateful.

With love,

Simona